How to Revamp the Oscars: A Genius Plan
This year's Academy Awards got the worst ratings in ceremony history. Madeleine Brand talks to comedy duo Frangela (aka Frances Callier and Angela Shelton), former Seinfeld writer Peter Mehlman, fashion editor Laurie Pike and 1950s historian Charles Phoenix about how they'd fix the show.
Enough enchanted sappiness. Hire back Debbie Allen for "Debbie Allen dance breaks" and the kids from Step Up in midriff-baring outfits, of course.
Up the booze factor with waitress cocktail service.
Hire Prince and say goodbye to the current music guy with a lifetime achievement award.
Bye-bye boring awards like adapted screenplay and short documentary. Move them to another day when no one has to see them.
End long speeches with a bang by replacing the musical signal to shut up with "Sandman" from the Apollo.
Peter Mehlman's Solution
Promote gambling by letting people know the exact number of votes each nominee received.
Laurie Pike's Solution
Embrace catty commentary by broadcasting the conversations of the people in the audience.
Charles Phoenix's Solution
Who needs the Kodak? Have it outside around the swimming pool or at a drive-in movie theater.
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